So Wilde + The Mystery


"I never approve or disapprove of anything now. It is an absurd attitude to take toward life. We are not sent into the world to air our moral prejudices. I never take notice of what common people say and I never interfere with what charming people do. If a personality fascinates me, whatever mode of expression that personality selects is absolutely delightful to me."

- Oscar Wilde

*Coffee mug: RongRong Devoe


It is the simple things which create the best moments.



MY THOUGHTS: 
The Mystery


Ever since my initial post "Class + Style" I have been getting an abundance of emails and comments here and there about this 'mystery guy'.  It is not a mystery, he is a friend of mine and yes, we have shared romantic moments but, we still consider ourselves as friends.  And, yes, I do refer to him every now and then.  I empathize that some people may have concern about him for me but, with all that I do share with the world, there is much that I do not share for my own personal reasons...I am the one who is living this experience and although I can appreciate everyone's thoughts, I am the one who has to live out any decision I make regarding my friend. 

I know that it may be difficult for most people to comprehend our friendship but, with having bad memories from my last love spell, I am very adamant about building a friendship before anything else...how can anyone create a life with someone and not truly enjoy the person?...I cannot stress enough how grateful I am to have cross paths with this man and we always mention or joke about how we met, how everything happens for a reason, and how all the decisions we made that day led us to be introduced.  We both have our own versions of it and we chuckle about it each time but, that is how our foundation started. 

I speak highly of him because I think highly of him.  He understands my mindset and the direction I am taking in life and he respects my space.  We may always just be friends and I am fine with that and he knows this.  It is all positive energy.  I may never divulge any details about our relationship because those matters are between us.  Even some of my close friends just get the basic information about him..."He's fine."..."Everything is great."..."I still like him."...etc.

So, you will not see his face or know his name unless there is good reason for it or if certain events occur.  I fully believe in respecting the privacy of others especially when it also involves my own privacy.  Anything that is revealed openly will because of our actions and decisions together.  Until then...We're good.

Any future questions or inquires about this subject, we are just going to revisit this post. Cool? Cool.

On Another Note: 

People seem to think I have a slew of men calling me or texting me trying to date me.  Well, my response is as follows...


I will admit I am very particular with whom I communicate with, even more particular when it comes to men.  Sometimes when a man realizes I have little time for him, or senses that my interest is obsolete, he usually ends up eliminating himself from the equation.  So no, I do not have dozens of suitors beating at my door, there are no flowers being delivered to my office, my phone is not constantly ringing, and my text message inbox is lackluster.  The only reason I have a lock on my phone is because my children are professional criminals.  (-____-)

In all fairness, I will respond to those who I want to respond to and reach out to those who I feel is worth reaching out to.  If a man does not hear from me, it does not necessarily mean there was something wrong with him...or there could be something wrong with him and I just don't have the patience to tell a grown man about himself...again, I am...particular and somewhat difficult...So, any man who gets upset with me about my disinterest towards him...I don't care. It's not to be heartless, I just have too much else to focus on rather than coddle your hurt feelings due to my choices and standards.

Comments

Dashay said…
Guys prob ask just to see if they have a chance, women ask to just to be nosey and either be happy for you or throw shade. I agree that you should keep your personal business private even if you are just friends. No one needs to know what goes on between you two. I admire how you know to share what to share when to share. Happy holidays!
Anonymous said…
Naw, we just wanna size the dude up. Lol. I'm playing. But you single tho right? ;)
Lisa said…
"Where dey at doe" LOL!!! I am DYING!!!!! but I can see what you mean. A lot of people think that just because a woman is pretty and has her life together that her phone is blowing up. When actually she has her life together because she does not allow her phone to blow up. #Truth
Ashlee said…
That first picture is great!
Raya L. said…
Thank you darling! Happy Holidays!
Raya L. said…
Lol. I not about to play with you readers! Enjoy your holiday.
Raya L. said…
My sentiments exactly Lisa. It never fails for a man to ask me, "So how many dudes call you?" and my response is, "How many women call you?" Frankly I do not care especially if we are just meeting or we do not have a claimed "title". I just feel like some men or even women, make it a competition. Why? I am not about to compete with another woman for a man's attention. If he wishes to spend his time with someone else. Great, just don't sugar coat it for me or have me believing otherwise, because just like in this post (which is public for anyone to read) I am honest about the friend I have and if any man has an issue with it, either make it known or leave me alone. It doesn't mean I am going to change anything, it just lets me know how you think of me and then I can proceed with what type of communication I will have with you or if I even what to continue to know you depending on what you say and how you act. What I won't tolerate is a man judging or criticizing me for my decisions regarding my friend or even trying to big himself up by putting negative thoughts in my head. It has already happened with one person and I had to distance myself from him. If someone is going to speak badly about people in my life, then they are also speaking badly on me. I will not allow that type of energy in my circle.
Lisa said…
Ha! I know that's right! Men are good for doing that! Trying to convince us that another guy isn't worth our time. Smh. You and your friend seem to have a good understanding so I am sure by now you guys are used to this type of stuff. Lol.
Anonymous said…
That cup is perfect for you!

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