April 30, 2015

Class + Style

Dress: Upscale Boutique  Shoes: Jessica Simpson  Earrings: Sam Moon
If you have not noticed, I take pride in my appearance and how I present myself to the world.  If you look like a Lady, walk like a Lady, speak like a Lady, then guess what?  You will be treated like a Lady, more importantly, 'HE' will treat you like a Lady...(Another reference HERE)  

Class is not just an image, it is a behavior.  Any woman can be complimented on her beauty but, classy women are admired for their distinction. 


MY THOUGHTS:
Style

It's not just about attire, it is also your demeanor.

My coyness towards his warm embrace gave him a glimpse of my cautious heart.  His indiscreet glances at me without saying a word kept me curious about his quiet thoughts.  His debonair affections kept me in awe each second in his presence.  His connection to my spirit kept me lifted.
I do not really know this man and we could possibly never meet again but, he has shown me how much I can really enjoy being in the company of a true gentleman who is attentive to my comfort and security.  Although, in my true self, I did not make it easy for him at first to be next to me, calling him "decent" and being a bit nonchalant towards him; that faded.
Sometimes, just sometimes, you ignite with someone's smile and for a mere moment, time freezes and there are no worries with the world. You just breathe in their delightfulness, exchanging energies all the while saving that feeling in the depths of your soul.
Every moment in life we have choices and our actions follow....
I walked up to to the bar to order my drink, not really paying attention to his being. I could feel him looking but, I did not want to turn my head and have a socially awkward glance (I am still a bit shy in these types of occurrences.) I stayed mute because, "Sweetheart, when you dance with me, You sir, must take the lead." He did. 

If he never said a word to me as I waited for my order, he would have watched me walk away and the two of us could have missed a necessary beat in life.

I also had the pleasure of meeting his friends whom were just as pleasant to be acquainted with.  I cannot appreciate him and his colleagues enough for being Lords of Chivalry.  Any woman would be blessed to have one of these dashing gentleman standing at the end of the aisle waiting for her.

It might have been divine intervention that I met this man and his associates. As if God wanted me to see a different light that only He can guide me to; keeping me mindful that I am worth every bit of attention that is drawn to my growth and efforts in being a good, classy woman.  And not being seen as some pretty girl who has been tainted by life's lessons and needs the attention to feed her insecurities.  No darling, I evolved away from that.

I have yet to learn the purpose of this man in my life, because everything happens for a reason, no matter how minuscule one may think the reason is; there is purpose to everything.  He may be just an instrument to the construct of what I need embedded within my thoughts about being open to someone's spirit without being reluctant or presumptuous with the idea not needing love.  Or he could become a life long voice in connection to my continuous growth in this world.  Whatever purpose he holds, I accept it.

Some critics may say that I am romanticizing the whole experience because I do not truly know this man in his everyday environment, and that I am being naive to a temporary notion that may be just a fantasy.  Well, my response to that is "I. DON'T. CARE."  Even if this is all a figment of my imagination, I still want to forever save this memory and refer back to it anytime I feel that Man has lost all senses in the proper treatment towards a Lady.  So all you critics can see yourself off MY stage and exit left please, thank you.

....and to think, I was just going to stay in on Saturday.

I Live.


Interesting conversations with random people: 

Man: What do you do for a living young lady?
Me: I live.
Man: And what does that consist of?

Me: I live suited to my preference. I never stray from who I am or allow others to discourage from me from myself. I enjoy what I have and work for what I want. Life is about learning through your experiences and making the most of those lessons. I remain unscathed from hurdles because I know I am strong enough to move on.

Man: Young lady, you are exceptional.
Me: I thank my father.


In the process of stabilizing family, career, friends, and love connections, have fun with life.  Jump in the pool with all your clothes on.  Dance in the rain.  Sing like an idiot in your car.  Bake a cake for your neighbors, just because.  Gather your friends and have an old fashion tea party.  Get yourself a happy meal with an extra juice box.  Sit on the roof of your house and sleep under the moon.  Run on The Great Wall of China.  Lean with the Tower of Pisa.  Touch a pyramid.  Climb the Mayan Ruins.  Search for Amelia Earhart's final resting place.  Speak Latin.  Get lost in Greece.  Carve your name in wet cement.  Build a tree house.  Share a sandwich with a stranger.  Laugh until your bones hurt.
I mean....what else are you going to do with life?

April 27, 2015

Dear Future Husband.....



Dear Future Husband,

I promise to love you as you are throughout our progressive changes together.  I will travel every journey with you.  I will not allow what occurred before you to hinder my support for you. I will only challenge you to be greater. If you make mistakes, I will help you correct them.  If you are in pain, I will help you become stronger. Provide us stability and we will stay afloat even during rough currents.  Keep the communication open and we will never lose our friendship.  Give me your attention and receive my appreciation.  Show me to the world as your light and I will keep you from darkness.  Gaze at me with admiration and receive my nurture.  Continue to see beauty within me and never be without my affection.  Let us decide together our prosperity.  Let us heal one another from the madness that may torments us.  Let us compliment each other's spirit.  Let us share laughs and tears.  Let us educate one another with passion.  Let us grow wiser together.  Want me always, hold me consistently, miss me frequently, kiss me dearly, and love me forever.  I will be the *Nyx to your Chaos and we will create a universe of dynamic order.

Although, be mindful that if you hurt me, let me down, turn your back on me, stop making me laugh, digress from the loyalty you had with my heart, and show little action to engage my love, then please understand, my faith to you will diminish and I will question the promise I made.  If you push me to pain, the only thing you may be privileged to is my distant friendship. 

Do not let me in your heart if it does not have enough space to keep me. 

One Day In My Thoughts,
Your Brighter Future


*In Greek Mythology, Chaos was the start of the universe.
He ruled over confusion and emptiness.
Chaos created Nyx, the Goddess of the night.
Nyx and Chaos then created the beginning of creation for the world
which brings "Order to Chaos" by their successors.

(Genealogy Myths differ from book to book and other publications.)


I won't be perfect but, I want you to accept and smile at my imperfections.

April 25, 2015

Nude + Communication


My favorite boutique, "Upscale" in The Woodlands, TX just stocked this nude dress. ( I got it in black too.) What I love is that the dress is not thin so I don't need to wear a slip under it and it's not short, so I can walk in the office or the lounge without being obscure. 

The white top however, is an interesting story.  I bought it at Forever 21. When I walked in, I didn't really have anything in mind that I wanted to buy, it was just one of those days that I needed some retail therapy. I saw this top on the hanger and automatically picked it up.  The line was long for the fitting room and the store was a bit crowded so I just went ahead and paid for the top.  One night as I was getting done with work, I planned to meet an acquaintance for dinner.  I was still wearing a bland gray work dress and blazer but, I didn't want to stop home and change.  The I remembered the Forever 21 bag still sitting in my backseat. I got to the restaurant early and changed in my car.

Here was my dilemma.....when I bought this shirt, I thought is was a DRESS! So now that I am almost naked in my car, I had to do something.  Then I noticed I had some safely pins in my change tray and I made this shirt work!  I pinned the front inconspicuously and unless I admitted to what this garment was, no one was the wiser.  I'll show pictures in a future post. 


MY THOUGHTS:

Communication


Someone put this view in my head and I've been analyzing it ever since. 

Is this really accurate?  Well, I presume it is all in how you perceive the meaning.  For me, if there is someone close to me or someone who I believe could become close to me there is a certain amount of communication that takes place but, what happens when the communication dies down or becomes obsolete?  

Let's look at this thought in a romantic relationship aspect. 

If your partner becomes mute or seems to be distant in conversation, should you wonder?  Is there something that may be revealed if conversing too much or too long?  Could your partner be concerned with saying something incriminating that you would automatically pick up on? 

I do find some truth to this.  If you enjoy someone's time and company, why would you not respond or contribute to keeping a steady flow of communication between the two of you?  Why allow unnecessary questions of why you are inattentive? 

If the interest is gone, then would it not be best to communicate that?

This is definitely a point of view to ponder more about.

April 22, 2015

Fitting Better + What if he is Perfect....


I am still on track to becoming more fit by May 23 (birthday). This dress fit my "okay" before but, now that my hips are a bit more defined, the dress fits and looks great on my shape. There are still some flawed areas I need to work on (love handles) because my birthday dress is UNAPOLOGETIC. 


MY THOUGHTS: 

What if he is Perfect

I will be first to raise my hand and admit I have done this.......and still do this.....and am doing it right now.  I'm SORRY, I have a problem! And I know I am not the only one.  Many women face this problem.  If he's not calling; he's with someone else.  If he's not asking me out; he's not interested. blah blah blah....WHY do we do this????  We torment ourselves for WHAT?!   I've gotten better at not feeding on the "doubtful" thoughts and leaving them alone just as quick as they pop in my head mainly because I do not like drama and thoughts like this can lead to dramatic and unnecessary circumstances.  The excuse I make for myself is that I am cautious and that I do not want to be naive....which inadvertently causes me to be very much guarded, maybe more than necessary leading to complete destruction of my possible happiness.  UGH!  How do I stop my brain from doing this?

April 11, 2015

BooHoo + Chemistry



I have about 5 dresses of this style in different colors from BooHoo.com.  They are my 'go-to' outfits when I cannot figure out anything to wear.  On sunny casual days I wear it as is. For special plans, I may put on some heals and a blazer of fitted sweater. 




MY THOUGHTS: 

Chemistry


I'm not sure who said this, it was not Nas, but he's ill enough that people would believe he said it (yeah, I think Nasir Jones is Dope.) If you think about the long standing relationships you know of, what are the key factors that keeps him with her or her with him? All the women who you see post 'body' pictures of themselves with suggestive captions, are they 'single'? I emphasis single because any gorgeous woman can be involved but not fully committed to the foundation of a relationship. Yet, let me not make my words seem definitive since every union is different and I am not speaking on behalf of every woman or relationship dynamic but, for the most part I've noticed many of the 'eye candy' have been in just as much relationship turmoil as those who aren't 'eye candy'.  A beautiful and curvy woman can be just as single as a plain Jane. 

Personality is a source to the heart.  Whether it be romance or platonic, the characteristics that define your personality is what people grasp and create memories with.

Physically, we like what we like (I am attracted to tall men who hit the gym at least twice a week, with a great smile, and clean shaven face) but, what we see isn't always enough to make us stay or keep us intrigued.  

Ladies, have you ever been asked, "You're so pretty, why are you single?"
Well. The simple answer from me is, "I'm not ready." Which thoroughly translates to, I am not in a place in my life where I can commit to someone's emotions other than my own and my children. This is not to say I will not enjoy someone's company. I will definitely carve space out of my life to learn someone who may have caught my interest but, I will not change my mind about being single overnight.

What's worth the significance is worth the time.

Until a woman is ready to step off her own pedestal and allow him to place her on his, she will continue to present herself as 'available for the taking.' That does not mean she will take every number or go home with every man she deems worthy, it just simply implies that she keeps her options open.

April 6, 2015

Lulla Blue + Local Pour


Yup, same dress different colors from Lulla Blue at Vintage Park Houston, TX. 
I wore the gray look for a girls night out at Local Pour on Friday.
The blue look was for the Easter Egg Hunt on Saturday.


LP is an upscale bar and grille located in the Montrose area of Houston that's great for hanging out with friends.  They have a unique restaurant set up with different height tables, booths along the walls, a bar, and lounge area.  They also have live music which is always great.  I met the girls there a little after 8pm for dinner, the menu is nothing special, your usual American bar meals, but still good.  Then at 10pm a cover band came on and did their renditions of songs from the 80s to current such as Prince, Michael Jackson, Megan Trainor, Katy Perry, Backstreet Boys, Spice Girls, etc. Let's just say we had a blast dancing the night away! 

*There were a few sprinkles of eye candy but, none worth more than a simple glance.  A few approached us and said hi but it didn't go further than that.  
"Oh, you silly boys." 

April 5, 2015

Special Sunday


Whatever your faith is or what belief you follow, today many of us still came together with loved ones to share laughs and made memories.  This morning I got the kids up to attend services.  This was our forth Sunday at our new church and the kids have really taken a liking to it.  Our next step is to become members and for me to join a life group.


And of course the kids and I dressed for the occasion.  If my dress looks familiar, then you paid attention to the recent JcPenny's commercial.  Vanessa's dress is from Target and Gabriel's look is from H&M.


After services we had lunch at our favorite Hibachi restaurant at Vintage Park.

April 3, 2015

Wind Fails + Not Looking for Daddy


 The best lighting for pictures is always natural lighting but when outside on a windy day I always have to fuss with my hair when it's down.  So snap as many pictures as you can and hope that at least one comes out great. 

Dress is from Forever21


MY THOUGHTS: 

Not Looking for Daddy


This can be a sensitive topic for women...and men. 
(I know there are great single fathers out there, I was raised by one.)

I am not opposed to dating men who do not have children, I will be completely honest and say I am hesitant about men who do not have experience with children.  He has to understand that he is coming into an already made family and there may be new things that he'll need to learn or become accustomed to. 

Yet, I am also just as hesitant with men who do have children; our parenting styles are likely to be different which can cause conflict.

Either way, single parents do have to be careful and selective with who they become serious with, especially those with young children like myself. Someone who may be good for you may not be good for your kids.

I praise and speak of my father often.  He raised me, he gave me a great childhood, he spoils my children, and he continues to provide me with the guidance I need to be great, but guess what?  He is not my birth father.  Nope, my mother married an American man when I was 5 years old, this man accepted me as his own child.  He did not have children of his own yet, so he married a single mother and conceived two other children with her.  The marriage failed and the two have been divorced since I was 11 years old.  My mother left the house and went on with her life while my "step-father" dedicated his life to raising 3 children on his own. How awesome is that?

April 2, 2015

Almost Perfect + Chivarly



This dress could almost be perfect if the material was not so.....thin.  I love the style, color, and fit, I just cannot wear it without wearing a long cardigan or sweater or a slip skirt underneath.  But, the back is the best part of the dress and I don't want to cover it.

The dress is from Boohoo.com



MY THOUGHTS:
Chivalry


I refuse to believe that chivalry is dead. 
I also refuse to believe that only the elder generation practice it.

I'm all for women being independent and managing their own homes, jobs, finances, families, etc.  It's awesome but, we are still WOMEN and as for myself, I still like for him to open the door and extend his hand to help me out.  Is it necessary?  No but, the gesture is appreciated.  Also, another tiny thing I admire is when he opens the door to let me walk in first and as I am walking in, his hand is slightly behind my waist as if to signifying 1. I am his company 2. If there is someone or something that's in my way he can just pull me out of caution. I guess I would consider that a "protective" gesture.

In casual settings around friends and family, chivalry doesn't have to be as prominent but, still considered.  Come stand with me if I am conversing with people and join the conversation or just see how I'm doing. Show light affection like a forehead kiss or half hug (for serious couples) or a simple back caress and move on.  Just show subtle acknowledgements that I am there with you.

I've also noticed, with some of my male friends, they insist on walking on the "outside" of a sidewalk (closer to the street) when walking with a woman. A woman who does not know the importance of this was not taught right or is used to the wrong type of man...I cannot recall if my ex did this since I have gotten used to blocking him out of memory but, considering I cannot think of any chivalrous gestures, he probably did not display any. But, let's not cry me a river...I've learned better.

We also must take into account that if a woman wants a man to be chivalrous, she has to be worthy of it and carry herself like a lady.  It's only right. Why should he accommodate you if you have a funky attitude and is ungrateful to him.