As the years go on and another new year is upon us, many of us have learned to take care our own needs because the men, for one reason or another, fall short of being adequate in our lives.  Now, of course we women need to analyze what we need vs what we want and what we can live with vs what we can do without.  We also need to accept the fact that men do not think and speak like us.  Understanding is key.

Understand most men are like children...acting before assessing.  Yes, they grow into men but, they can still behave in the simplest boyish notions. 😑😔😕😞 Evolution has a funny way of skipping certain details.

**My father even irritates my soul when when he says or does things without giving full thought to it...and this man is damn near a genius. 😫

I am also becoming the woman who will be married before anyone even knows that I have someone in my life. ✋ Unless it is necessary for you to know, then as far as I am concerned, everything about him is not your business.  At most, I'll share with my friends and family the basic details but, with everyone else...."Yeah, there's a man I like."

I have learned over the years that privacy is very important, for your relationship and for yourself.  A friend and I had this discussion the other day, not everyone needs to know your every plan or your next step.  She brought up a great point, When people are privy to insight into your life they begin to feel entitled to continue to know more...further giving or enforce their own opinions onto you.  Sometimes you can receive advice without really asking for it.

I have good people around me and I know they will not refer their thoughts to me absent of their genuine concerns but, I also like to give myself the chance to identify what I can change before seeking guidance.  And when they do share their input, I welcome it, whether or not it is in favor of what I feel about it.  As we grow through life we ideally should learn to take in the world around us and see the benefits of each crack.

As stubborn as I can be, I am open to opposing views and can appreciate the different perspectives.  We cannot evolve if we remain one dimensional. 

- Love Raya

EMAIL: xoxo.rayal@gmail.com

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