June 28, 2016

Fairytales + Food Bank

I like dressing up.  I enjoy being a woman.  I aspire to be an image of class.
I do not always dress in form fitting dresses, sometimes I  gravitate to a more girlish look. 

Food Bank

As much as I love food...I mean, it's probably a sin how much I love and consume food...and my kids share the same enthusiasm...

 ...but, I cannot forget that there are families who do not live the same lifestyle as myself and my children. I volunteer at the Houston Food Bank at least a few times a year, this time I decided to bring my daughter and have her be a part of something this is meaningful to her community.  I am not sure if she fully comprehended why we were there but, she enjoyed the work she did and asked when she could do it again....Yeah...my attempts on raising a good human aren't all lost. 

Want to share your thoughts? Send me an email: xoxo.rayal@gmail.com 

June 25, 2016

Mendes + The Proposal

This dress was really a surprise find: New York & Company 
Over the years, the store itself has somewhat become something similar to....well, a secondary brand to a third choice...harsh, but true...they have even brought in Eva Mendes to advertise a line within the shop to revive the name...it kind of worked.  This dress is from the Mendes selection.  The tailoring from the waist down is flattering but, the waist up, well let's just say maybe it is because I am lacking in the chest area that this dress was not as fitting on top.  Overall, I did get a lot of compliments and someone stated that I looked like a "Rich Man's Wife"....whatever that is supposed to mean.

The Proposal

I honestly believe that for a relationship to begin and be validated, the man is the one who needs to present a woman with one (see here for another post reference).  But does that mean that a woman needs to drop hints to the man she wants a relationship with?  If I like a man on a more personal level, then I will make it known to him....and I am not talking about simple friendly behavior like calling him and asking how his day was, because I did have several experiences where a platonic guy friend misinterpreted my behavior and thought I was interested in something more.  No, I am talking about a more personal and intimate behavior where I am the one who is forward with romantic topics.  If nothing else, I am great with my words and I am good with conveying what I think about a man I may be interested in.  And if that man does not pick up on my interest towards him, then I'm not going to keep voicing my thoughts, I am going to eventually grow weary and move on.  

But what if a man whom I do like were to ask me...ME...to be his lady?  Men have far less patience than women; what if a man were patient enough to deal with me...ME?

There may be men who are interested in me but, I do not have interest in all these men and I do not think any of them really know me so well that they know how skewed my mind has become towards men and relationships...well, unless they are avid readers of my blog, then all bets are off...but could a man really be willing to dig through my psyche and break down everything I built up to keep him out?

I don't know how to be in a relationship.  The only real experience I had with one ended in disaster...even though I came out of the mess like a shooting star, it was still very trying to my persona...Could the man who wants me be able to understand all of that?  Could he be so benevolent towards my guarded heart that he is able to find what I once lost?  If a man were to propose a relationship, I do not know how I would respond.  Correction, if the right man wanted to procure me, I definitely would not know how to respond...and this is where my true insecurity comes in...What if I am not fit to be in a relationship?...Am I aware enough to identify when I am pushing him away?  Am I healed enough to reciprocate his affections?  Am I caring enough to comfort him when he needs me without asking me?  Am I unselfish enough to love him as he loves me?

Is this what we all unconsciously think when considering relationships?  Or do most of us just take the dive and see how well we can swim against any currents.  What if people stated these thoughts before entering a union?  Would it open more lines of communication and understanding?

Lord, please just bring me a patient man...a very, VERY, patient man.

Want to share your thoughts? Send me an email: xoxo.rayal@gmail.com 

June 19, 2016

Daddy Dearest

This is Daddy Dearest. 

Daddy Dearest came into my life when I was 5 years old. 

Daddy Dearest came to all my school activities. 

Daddy Dearest worked hard to give me the best.

Daddy Dearest spoils my children worse than he has spoiled me.

Daddy Dearest tolerates my foolishness. 

Daddy Dearest continues to raise me.

Daddy Dearest won't let me drive his new little two-seater.

I love my Daddy Dearest. ❤


You can't tell me a damn thing about MY DADDY!  He is my air.  He has always supported me even when he did not agree with my decisions he didn't tell me I was wrong, he just let me learn my own lessons.  I am forever his child.  When I am around him, I act very much as a child like asking him to make me a sandwich and cutting off the crusts, and although he may seem irritated with me at times, I don't care, I'm still a clown around him!  I am very much an Untamed Daughter.

Enjoy the day!

June 10, 2016

Comfort + Entitlement

Never hide behind your insecurities and allow unhealthy people in your life who feed off those insecurities.  Always think the most of yourself and know that you can change paths to better surroundings. - LoveRaya

The first I do when I get home is kick off my heels. I really do not like wearing them that much but, they do complete an outfit so I guess I'll take it.

Sometimes the kids and I just like to sit on the driveway and have philosophical conversations about life.....and bubbles.


Do you ever come across people who always feel they are owed something (a compliment, praise, opportunity, sympathy, etc.) and every time you speak to them they always try to "one up" you or just have the last word in everything because they feel that their accomplishments or lack there of, their emotions, their experiences, is enough to shade yours?

Here is my thought on this type of person...

You were given your obstacles, I was given mine.  What I was built for and what you were built for may not be parallel.  This doesn't make me better than you or you better than me.  Your journey will not be exact to someone else's because we all make our own decisions accompanied with the sources available to us individually.  Always trying to shade my accomplishments, my joy, my setbacks, and my pain by speaking at me or trying to dismiss me with your stories instead of emphasizing with me, speaks upon poor characteristics.

And, if you noticed, most "entitled" people always add the reasons of their accomplishment by mentioning how someone else could not complete a task or come through for them and the reason for their setback is again due to someone else. It is very much like a sore winner and a sore loser, no one enjoys too much time around either of them.

Take pride in what you do with humility.
Accept what you have not been able to do with humility.

Want to share your thoughts? Send me an email: StyledMa.Blog@gmail.com 


I finally made it to Liberty Kitchen in The Heights!

I ordered the Wood Grilled Oyster Casino Butter and Hot Smoked Seattle Salmon Slab (not pictured). My friend ordered herslef the Classic Jungle Gorilla Burger Bowl. (minus the egg and fries, she's being health conscious....boooo!)

I loved what I ordered.  The salmon was flavorful and not over cooked.  The oysters were creamy and I liked the crumbs they dressed them with.  My friend enjoyed her's as well but, said the plate was over saturated with the ranch sauce and the salad had too much of the sweet vinaigrette.  

The place is small and quaint. It is also surrounded by other small restaurants and cafes. 
Parking is tight but, manageable.

After lunch, we headed over to A 2nd Cup.

This is such a unique coffee shop! 

It is a federal nonprofit shop: Their mission is to bring awareness to human trafficking in Houston (more and more cases of it are being reported). Proceeds help to assist employees and volunteers stop this this growing epidemic that negatively effects our community.

June 7, 2016

Efforts + Positive

You have to do more than just "Show Up" in life.

If you want great opportunities, you have to put in the effort to receive them.

The decisions you made before today are your ladders. If you did not make the best decisions, do not expect second chances or blame others for your missteps; instead, proceed forth and make better choices for yourself. - LoveRaya

This whole look is from Target.
I swear, even if I have an endless bank account, I could never turn my back on stores like Target. (I even hold 2 stock shares in this establishment.) 

Now, the Cheesecake Factory is not on top of my favorites list but, it deserves credit for making good treats...

Shrimp Summer Rolls, Suasage and Ricotta Flatbread, Dulce De Leche Caramel Cheesecake
If you want to see more of my food adventures, check out @Unapologetic.Foodie


I do my best to always carry positive thoughts.  Yet, I am still human and have a very unpositive side as well but, for the most part, good vibes get the upper hand.

I always find that when I allow and embrace a glass as being half full, the thought of it being half empty doesn't even occur.  I won't discuss why I couldn't do something but, rather discuss what changes I made to get it done.

I work a 9-5 like most of you and my title requires me to be very organized, detailed, and able to articulate my thoughts in a professional manner.  I am at ease when I am left alone to complete my work BUT, that is not how my day usually works.  Something always comes up, cancels, doesn't go as planned, more calls to be made, new reports to be completed, emails to be answered, meetings to schedule, etc....and in the beginning, I would let all unexpected tasks to bother me and derail my focus.  I would shut down, not communicate with my co-workers, and get overwhelmed but, I have learned to think progressively and give ample time for each task because I knew I was capable and I had to block out the negative thoughts I was creating towards myself.

  Sometimes I have an 8 hour day, sometimes it is a 10 hour day, and sometimes I am doing work at home, during the weekends.  This does not bother me because it makes my work day go smoother and if I spend a few hours at home to have a better work week, then so be it.  I like being able to better manage my office and being able to give attention to what needs my immediate attention, like taking meetings and making necessary calls.  I understand that not all jobs or careers allow this type of advances and requires all work to be done in office.  Yet, there is always a way to make your day go well, you just need to find a productive groove and ride it out.

But not just at work do I practice a less taxing mindset, my overall lifestyle reveals it.

My demeanor is 90% lively (I give 10% to my bad days, I am not void of having those every once and a while.) I congratulate and praise those whom are doing well.  Even if I am not in full support of someone, I will still encourage them because I know not everyone's journey will be similar to mine.  And, I do not allow someone's misfortune or bad experiences to hinder my mood or make exchange on my good thoughts.

Plus, another behavior and thought I have adapted through positive thinking is...

A man can be head of the house but, I will maintain the household with or without him.

Want to share your thoughts? Send me an email: StyledMa.Blog@gmail.com 

Just For Laughs:

June 3, 2016

3 + Priorities

It has been us 3 well before the separation of their father and I.  
We've been a team since Gabriel came into the world.

Dress: Urban Outfitters


So, we all know I'm single....if you are new here, 
Hello, my name is Raya and I am single. Welcome to my mad house! 

The question once again...."Why are you single." My instant response has become, "Why are you wasting my life with this foolish question?"...but, that would not be 'good human' of me.  So, I simply say that I have low tolerance for intolerable men.


Look, I know there are great men out here but, I've become so conditioned in my way of life the last 4 years that to derail my attention on a man who doesn't understand my individuality and respect it *insert Birdman line*....

 In which case, I have no tolerance for his complaints or requests of me if he rather only consider his preferences.  It is not as widely admitted or spoken but, generally some men cannot accept a woman being "able" without him.  Why?  Why would you not want a woman who doesn't need to call on you for everything?  Especially if you, yourself, have your own daily schedule for success and growth???  We can collaborate and come together but, I am still a whole separate person from you. 

If he is going to get upset that I do not return a call or text message within the same hour...or sometimes the same day (yes, I tend to be bad at responding)...
then we cannot go together.

If he tries to dig into my past experiences to validate why I am not opening up to him...
then we cannot go together. 

If he attempts to play on my insecurities to understand why I don't want to be with him...
we cannot go together.

If he feels that I waste MY MONEY on things that he believes are lavish and unnecessary...
then we cannot go together.

If he fusses about me spending time with my family in between everything else I do...
then we cannot go together.

If he assumes that my absence towards him is due to me considering someone else...he may be right BUT, unless I say it and he still makes assumptions...
then we cannot go together.

I am very honest about my relationship hesitations and my family values; if a man wants to turn what I say to him against me, then I am not the one with the problem.  Understand me as I am or find someone else who is willing to change for you.  I'll make exceptions but, only for the right man.  My priority in my future relationship is to be understanding with the basis of logical reasoning and to also be understood.