Yes, it’s been a while since we last spoke. I’ve been a little busy with….well, life. There are a few new moving parts with my work life that’re going into the new year, and I’m just trying to figure out a way to juggle it all. But let’s move on to this highly anticipated topic.
Ladies, over the years we’ve shared thoughts of how men can be extremely attractive by doing non-sexual things that are considerate or show how they feel about us. Here is a compiled list from various women:
Checking in on you - There’s a smile that comes over my face when I see a certain name pop up on my phone that is just asking how my day has been, what I’m up to, or what my plans are. That small kind of communication can go a long way.
Bring you water, food, or a cocktail - This one is a combination of different things, but the common action is a man providing what you may need or want in the moment. I am normally the one who makes sure everyone eats, but I definitely notice when I’m hanging out, and a man automatically brings me a drink or water. Paying attention to my body language and my energy is such an admirable gesture.
Being dominant but not possessive or aggressive - This one is a little tricky to explain. There is a certain way a man can assert his dominance without disrespecting you or hurting you. There’s a certain tone or demeanor he’ll take on to let you know he’s bothered by something or needs you to settle down a bit. Maybe he’ll pull you aside and whisper something to you, or he’ll use a word or phrase that triggers you to refocus or redirect. Men who know how to do this just have a unique way of doing it. It’s almost similar to when you were a kid, and you were acting up in public, but then your mom shoots you a look, and that look lets you know you need to calm down or there will be consequences. This is nothing relative to abuse; that’s a different matter. This is more of a subtle way to get you to be self-aware and to sit down.
He diffuses a tense moment - I don’t know about the rest of you ladies, but I love it when a man can settle a problematic person or a tense situation without making it worse. He just knows how to talk to people and turn bad energy into calm or good energy.
Fitness - Call some of us superficial, but a few ladies on here, plus myself, appreciate a fit man, not necessarily overly muscular, like his whole life is about the gym, but just fit enough to see muscles without him flexing.
Dressing like a gentleman - This one may be up for debate because we all don’t have the same tastes, but I love to see a man who doesn’t wear overly baggy or overly tight clothes. I love a classic and modest look, a simple collar shirt, and jeans or slacks that fit him well. I don’t like big chains or gaudy earrings. I like seeing men with very grown and gentlemanly looks.
Chivalry - This seems to be a big one amongst the ladies. Opening doors, being polite, having manners, walking on the outside of the street, and making sure you are comfortable are such attractive gestures. Like…God bless whoever raised you, and God bless the fact you didn’t get ruined by today’s new generation of rude and entitled people.
Not trying to keep up with the younger crowds - This topic was a big discussion this year and probably last year, too. I love a man who embraces his age. He’s not ashamed of it, and he’s not trying to look or feel younger by surrounding himself with a young crowd. Now, let me chime in and say that yes, I do have a group of friends that are relatively younger than me, but there are no romantic interests or connections with any one of them. Plus, I mentor some of them, so what do I look like being intimately involved with someone their age? So it’s okay to mentor a girl who’s 25, and it’s okay to date a man who’s 25?? No, that makes no sense to me, BOTH need mentors. There are times when I am out enjoying my night, the young crowd is there with me, but most of the time, I head home before them because I acknowledge that my energy is different from theirs - and I admire a man with the same mindset. Yes, the younger generation may be more eager to catch your attention, but at the end of the day, our lives are not aligned, and that will cause some miscommunication and friction if I am involved with one of them. - Honey, who has the time and energy to constantly talk some understanding to someone who isn’t yet experienced enough in life to understand? I might as well be raising another child. Plus, from what I’ve observed, the younger ones see the older generation as an opportunity, and depending on the scenario, that could be a positive or a negative. So yes, I find it attractive when a man is aware of these things and doesn’t blur the lines when it comes to interacting with other age groups.
There you have it, the top 8; I’m sure some of you ladies have more to add! So I will update accordingly.
Be safe, everyone.
